Just the thought of being self-reliant in a completely foreign country is a scary life-changing leap. You leave the comfort of having your family, friends, and everything else you’ve grown to know behind. Yes, it may take months or even years to really dealt with all these (dramatically!) — I, at some point, still lose the balance of how my emotions should be, knowing how this opportunity has boomed my career in the face of being away from my family.
But with all that said, I at rest, have no choice but to learn my way around loneliness. To understand that losing balance with our emotion is part of living a balanced life. To really make a map of it, sit with it, for once in our lives. That’s how I welcome myself to the human experience. Operation self-esteem, toughness, buoyancy, and a lot more!
So, “On a positive note of moving abroad alone..” I’ve come to recognize 6 (and the list goes on) ways out through:
SOLIDLY BUILD A CONNECTION WITH GOD
Loneliness comes in many forms. In a new place, it’s an easy trap to think that you are the only one who doesn’t fit in, that everyone else is already set in a group, and that there is no room for you. The answer is to look for the Lord who promises to be everything we need. “God alone is enough.” Being distant and ousted from what used to be our comfort zone could be very hard, but a relationship with God will be what sustains us. Continue to seek for His face, and you’ll find a buddy for a lifetime. After all? eat, PRAY, love, isn’t popular for no reason.
CHERISH FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS MORE
Being away from your loved ones while life obviously goes on for all of you may seem like a minor detail. But it’s in these tiny moments where emotional long distance relationship with them takes its toll. While feeling lonely at times cannot be helped, there are ways by which you can still maintain family closeness despite the distance. Homesickness and falling out, these can be solved through collective effort of communication with one another.
Sure it carries a lot of nerve and intestinal fortitude to send our parents those sweet and mushy text messages. UNLESS, (in my case, yes) we are miles apart from them. Now you send them loads of it afraid of not having the chance to do it all again. As one saying goes.. “never get so busy growing up, that you forget your parents are growing old.”
PRACTICE SELF-LOVE & RADIATE
Serenity in life is contentment with your own skin. Solitude is a great way to get back in touch with your feelings and remember all the things that makes you awesome. Learn to be happy with just yourself and everything else will follow. Also, clearing out distractions and allowing time for reflective thought is a great way to tap into your creativity. Hence, blessing and inspiring the people around you too!
PROACTIVELY PLAN A FUTURE
As you see more of the world, you become more ambitious about the possibilities of making it to the peak of your dreams. You gain (not just new, but) global perspective, you’ve learned your capabilities, you set goals, and you’ve come to be more positive and confident that you could really make it happen in no time soon.
LET LOOSE, CULTIVATE A PASSION
Creativity and curiosity are bred through contemplation. By bearing (so much) time alone, I’ve come to feel myself again. To spot my craft, and grab it good again. It has set me in contact with my inner self that it made me back here, (which I momentarily lose sight of) writing. Spending quiet time allows your imaginative genius freedom to explore possibilities and ponder on what would make your life the most worth living.
THE WORLD HAS A LOT TO TEACH, BE OPEN TO LEARN LIFE LESSONS
“Life’s biggest classroom: The World.” — Sure you have heard of it.
When I was just planning to leave, I had no idea so many life lessons are waiting for me overseas. Back home, I was known to be the “laging si nahihiya” (as my parents and my grandma addresses it), the “cannot place an order, nor commute alone” bessy of my high-school barkada, the boyfriend’s student which he has to repeatedly remind of his famous line “matuto kang lumaban, hindi laging mabait, hindi laging tahimik.” and so forth in such wise. *made me smile looking back! :)*
Nevertheless, nearing half a year now (how time flies), being alone forced me to handle uncomfortable situations and really grow. I’m now used to silence, stuffing myself alone, and finally worked up the courage taking the cab to places I’ve never been before. Even I cannot deem how changes like these happened subsequently over time. Now I’m counting it (somewhat) therapeutic, and I’m truly, deeply, happy and blessed about it!
“Moving abroad alone may be something that comes through your work or not. What’s substantial about it, is it brings you joy, engages you to your passion, and makes you conquer your fears and anxieties formulated by this borrowed life.”
Thank you for taking the time to read!